GET ME REWRITE: The last time Sergeĭ Viktorovich Lavrov, 72, had a stiff erection was March 4, 2002. Now he wants the world to pay for his flaccidness.

 

Source: New York Times, 4/26/2022 [red box added]

“They will continue that line by filling Ukraine with weapons,” said Mr. Lavrov, referring to Western countries’ efforts to arm the Ukrainian government. “If that continues, negotiations won’t yield any result.” 

On Monday, Mr. Lavrov raised the specter of a nuclear conflict, saying that while such a prospect would be “unacceptable” to Russia, the risks have increased because NATO is “engaged in a war with Russia through a proxy and arming that proxy.” 

“The risks are quite considerable,” he said in an interview with Channel One, Russia’s state-run TV network. 

“I don’t want them to be blown out of proportion,” he said. But “the danger [of my not having a boner in 20 years] is serious, real — it must not be underestimated.”

No need to emphasis the obvious, but right now I can't help myself.